And man, I let this stuff GO.
Lots and lots of YOUR comments to comment back at. You deserve it, you've been playing by the rules and seem to be enjoying yourselves.
We're just chillin' here, ya' know.
Anyway, AIM's newest version offers about 200 XM sattelite radio stations running nonstop. For some unGodly reason I seem to keep the All Janet Jackson channel going while I write this.
I never always had this black girl fetish... and EVERY brother I talk to says that the black girl is HELL to keep happy... and she NEVER puts out until major time and money is spent.
Which confuses me because since when do black guys have money?
BA DUM DUM... thank you, try the veal.
I had something very important to say here... but hell if I didn't forget what it was.
Oh, right! Remember a couple of months ago when someone linked a site in my comments section and when I went there I saw something so gross I almost yacked all over the place without jamming my finger down my throat? And I was so repulsed I refused to mention what it was or what I saw?
Yeah, well it turns out the video in question is pretty famous.
It was the little slice of pain called 2girls1cup
On a whim, I just re-checked the clip to see if I could handle it. Nope. As soon as the white girl dumnped in the plastic cup I started heaving.
I'M HEAVING NOW JUST TYPING IT AND FORCING MY MIND TO THINK ABOUT THIS!!!
The guy who made it says h...
And I just blew chunks of pasta gravy (with buffalo meat and pressed linquica) in my waste basket. Thanks. CAN WE MOVE ON BEFORE I PUKE OUT STOMACH ACID, PLEASE???
The ONLY cure for the hiccups, by the way, induce vomiting. Many a drunken evening has taught me this.
Christ, now I'll never listen to "Love Will Never Do" again without thinking of the time I sicked up in my perfectly fine/now useless wastebasket.
Look, google the goddam thing and see for yourself. It involves two chicks and a plastic cup full of poop... and other things. And there is smearing involved.
Let's just get to the fucking comments:
1)
November 9, 2007 10:27 PM Anonymous said... This is off-topic, and may have been asked in another comment previously, but I haven't seen an answer. Anyway... Have you read, or are you planning to read, Bret Hart's new book? I just finished it and I found it a great read. A very frank and earnest look back at his career, his life, and the business. He discusses his faults and shortcomings as openly as the things he is proud of, and it makes for some really compelling stuff. I do like most of your literary criticisms (I went out and read Monster by Kody Scott on your recommendation) so I'd like to hear what you think about this one. Thanks for the blogging.Well, I have not read the book because, as you may or may not know, I live in AMERICA, not Canada. Bret's book isn't in America yet. The WWE tried to work a deal with him to be the U.S. distributer but, in typical WWE arrogance, they told him that the American version of his book would have new edits on something like 440 of the 560 pages.
So Bret told them to go fuck themselves.
You gotta love McMahon's single-mindedness. The man is absolutely dying to get Bret back on WWE TV and build a program on Survivor Series 1997, and finally, after ten years of trying, he managed to soften Bret up by making him the feature nominee for the Hall of Fame last year.
Then he tried to stiff-arm Bret into showing up at Wrestlemania the next night. I understand his exact words were, "I expect you to be there."
So Bret told him to get bent and hopped a plane back to Hawaii. So NOW, Vince offered to have his publication arm distribute his book, but REFUSED to do so without giving it the official WWE wash. The man seems incapable of realizing that Hart doesn't need him anymore, and that Bret will NOT bow to his desires like everyone else does. (Even Hogan eventually does what Vince wants, there's just a LOT of headaches involved)
As far as reading it goes... well first let's throw in this comment and I'll make a whole thing about it:
2)
October 25, 2007 3:48 PM ...Anonymous said... Are you planning on reading/reviewing Chris Jericho's and or Dave Batista's book(s)?I started that damn "Book of the Whenever Club" as a direct reaction to all these tools screaming about ALL the wrestling books they've been reading, and all the ones they can't WAIT to read. The fuck...
These aren't good books either. They are WWE books... and if they aren't those then they are LOW RENT INDY PUBLISHED BOOKS!! Badly written, badly edited, with big words so they dumbass reader can easily read while moving their lips without getting headaches.
I have Mick Foley's first book and Ric Flair's book and that's ALL!! Batista's book, which is a love letter to Melina apparently, doesn't interest me. Jericho's book was written while he knew he was coming back to the WWE, so he intentionally wrote about everything that happened before going to the WWE... which I don't care about.
Every wrestling book that comes out, bar none, is a disappointment and not worth my time. You learn very little, you do NOT get the "real story", and most of these books usually centers around a "big reveal" which the wrestlers usually talk about to every interviewer who asks anyway.
All that being said, I probably would read Bret's book. 560 pages means there HAS to be some good stuff in there. But first I have to sit down with it in a bookstore and blitz through the first few chapters, to see if it holds my interest.
BTW, I pretty much read all of Foley's second book and Missy Hyatt's book in the bookstore. I'm not going near Foley's fiction books and his third one should'a been named, "I've run fresh out of stuff to say that the WWE would allow so let's talk about the Divas while my wife cashes the checks" I'd probably read it if that was the title.
Incidentally (because I refuse to start two paragraphs in a row with "BTW"), those "Book of the Whenever Club" segments were HORRIBLE to write. Have YOU ever tried to transcribe 10-12 pages of text from a little book onto your PC? Shit took HOURS.
3)
October 20, 2007 9:43 PM... Anonymous said... What comic books are you currently reading for free while drinking coffee? Have you tried Transmetropolitan, Ex machina , or Y the last man?First thing I grab are the current monthlies. Whatever's still there after a few weeks that grabs me. I stick with the ol' standbys from my youth: Bats, SOME Supes, X-Men, Spidey... you know, the basics.
Then I grab Ultimate Spider-Man and The Ultimates, because Brian Michael Bendis has re-created the entire Spider-Man universe and I am constantly amazed by how he works classic characters into the Ultimate context. His work on Ultimate Spidey is better than ANYTHING comics has created: Claremont's X-Men, Byrne's Fantastic Four, Miller's Daredevil, Morrison's JLA, Ennis's Punisher. The only two runs that Bendis can't touch is anything Stan Lee created (and Stan Lee is a bad writer, make no mistake, but he invented these characters and laid the groundwork that everyone just walks on now) and Peter David's Hulk... which is pretty much the gold standard for a life's work on a single character.
When I settle down to read trade paperbacks... I keep going for old faithful stuff, like Morrison's X-Men (another amazing run that's only problem was that it had its share of storyline flops), Ennis's Punisher (the old series where he blew Wolverine's face off, had a Russian transexual beat the shit out of an unconscious Spider-Man, "We had a team-up. You did great.", and then blew Wolverine's entire lower body off.), and other collections.
See, it's about VISITING OLD FRIENDS when I hit the bookstore for some comic book action... it's not about the confusing work of Warren Ellis or a world where there is one guy to a billion women and they want him dead... or they want his sperm... or soemthing. I don't care if it's award winning literature... I don't have 4 hours to kill. I want to visit some old friends who gave me something to read while growing up because I KNOW they won't change... except for Iron Man, of course.
Sometimes, I'll actually read a REAL book too!
One day I was in a bookstore reading "
Divas Uncovered " "TO KILL A MOCKINGBIRD" when some dude started talking to me about this cheapo sci fi book he was reading about a Squirrel who is ruling some galaxy. He was awfully loud. Many people told him to please keep it quiet but he was just so FASCINATED by this damn Squirrel emporer he wouldn't shut up.
I eventually had to take him to the bathroom and have gay sex with him, just to shut him up.
Never stop reading, people.
4)
October 15, 2007 9:49 AM... Anonymous said...BTW, check out THE DARK TOWER if you haven‘t. Funny how hard-core Constant Readers can be into King and not touch that. It’s not just Wizards and Goblins and shit… not REALLY. My advice is to start with book two.5)
October 15, 2007 12:50 PM... Anonymous said... They kept showing King and his Kid durring the Red Sox game the other day, then interviewed him. The guy is a frickin wierdo. Who reads at a playoff baseball game?6)
October 15, 2007 8:04 PM... Bruce said... I live about 10 blocks from Stephen King, and it is perfectly normal to see him walking down the street, coming back from the corner store, with a grocery bag in one hand and the book he is currently reading in the other. Of course he doesn't come out in public nearly as much as he used to, since the nut-jobs started hanging out harassing him. Think about how warped someone has to be to be stranger than Stephen King, strange enough to bother him. I met one of them once (the guy had his van covered in newspaper-style print with "evidence" that King had been the one who murdered John Lennon, not John David Chapman) and I could see why Mr.King was concerned, more for his wife and kids than himself, no doubt.You know, with Norman Mailer and Kurt Vonnegut passing on in '07. (Neither are really dead, they just stopped moving forward. Both have left a body of work that covers several decades so we can always travel back in time and visit them. I reckon Vonnegut never realized what an irony he was creating when he published "Slaughterhouse 5". And so it goes...) and with John Updike having no hope of becoming relevant or a considerable voice anymore (plus he's a dickhead), Stephen King, through his popularity, his prolificity, and his monthly back page column for "Entertainment Weekly" is now, in my opinion, the most influential author of our time. I would give him the title of "Greatest Living Author" but I have no idea how one qualifies for this and it's someone else's job to bestow this title to him.
And as far as influential goes, you can't go wrong with Stevie K. Doesn't he come across as a generally nice guy? Oh sure, he was a fall down drunk at one point, but who wasn't?
He's the one writer who's forewords/afterwords are just as interesting as the story itself. You gotta love how he breaks down how he writes his books. How a small moment starts bouncing around in his head until it becomes a full fledged vision of a story, and how he has to literally RUN to a computer, or a notebook, or a goddam pencil and a packet of brown lunch bags, to start getting shit down on paper.
That's a vivid imagination, but its not natural... well, it is, but it's HONED. Which brings me to the comments above.
I say King is the current author of influence because he reads books at ball games, in line at the bank, while WALKING DOWN ONE OF THOSE OLD COUNTRY ROADS THAT MAKE UP MAINE. When he's not reading, he's writing. Book after book after book after book... and in between he does magazine columns, short stories, novellas, and... Jesus Christ more short stories...
And in between all that he watches lots of TV, lots of movies, and listens to lots of music.
Not much time for a social life, but perfect conditions to channel his imagination into pop culture.
I met a fellow once who lives in Maine and he told me King stops in a local diner every so often for breakfast and the newspaper. Friendly enough, was the description, but quiet... weird. This was long before Bruce told us about his experience with the man in the comments and posted above.
The guy isn't weird, he's a loner. He's withdrawn, INTROVERTED. He needs to be. It's how he manages to be so good a writer, and such a good observer.
You know how our parents used to lecture us on stop being a spectator and get into the game? Well Stephen King is a born spectator... and he's parlayed it into a large empire.
He's a natural observer, and a self-trained detective. He sees things we don't. THAT'S what makes him brilliant, and a much needed voice on pop-culture.
Norman Mailer and Kurt Vonnegut, God Bless 'em, were blowhards who forced themselves to become bigger then the stories they were writing (more Mailer than Vonnegut). So when the generations of people who bought their books... and bought THEM, died out... they couldn't sell a page. Mailer tried twice in the last 12 years or so, with two books. One was about Jesus told as an autobiography. The other was about Hitler, told from the point of view of the Devil. (Basically a direct steal from the book "Dutch", which is the story of Ronald Reagen's Presidency told from a fictional aide... a book which completely tanked.)
Vonnegut, on the other hand, more or less stopped writing and just did speeches. Well received speeches... but he will always have an audience with the college crowd. And so it goes...
King, though, avoids the spotlight. We never heard of him getting sloshed on a book tour (even though, he apparently did), or whoring it up with young bitches (and I'm SURE he did). All we know about him is that he got hit by a van while walking down an old country road in Maine with a book in his hand. He keeps to himself... and watches EVERYTHING.
Voice of a culture? Naah, but voice ON a culture? Yup.
Anyway, he took a break from writing, then is now back writing 170 different things a year (and forget the bull about not wanting to write anymore... he was just sitting out and waiting on a big fat new book deal. King is a businessman after being a writer, make no mistake)
Stephen King is a writer, and what I like about him is that he's alway striving to improve. One of his best books was "The Green Mile", and that was produced as a monthly serial... which really lent to some thick sub-plots and fanatastic pacing. King really knew how to make each 90 page book stand out. He was one of the first to put out an Internet only short story "Riding the Bullet" and even tried to pull off what Radiohead recently did. He put out a book called "The Plant" online chapter by chapter and offered it for free... but ASKED the readers to kick in a dollar or so. It didn't work. Too many people, myself included, went for the freebie and King pulled the plug. But this is ten years before Radiohead did it.
Incidentally, the current work of King, since his sit-out/retirement, goes as follows: "The Cell" rocked, "Lisey's Story" is almost unreadable, and he has a new one coming out soon having to do with... I'm not sure, but it doesn't look too promising. I mean, its nice to see him work to imrpove his writing style and intensify his storytelling, but I went through the first hundred pages of "Lisey's Story" and was like, WHAT THE HELL IS THIS BOOL NONSENSE?
Yeah, so, he's a weirdo... and a loner, he's also got the skills and the right to tell us what's what. Well earned.
And to answer the question about his Dark Tower epic... part of me wants to read it all just to watch King evolve as a writer. He started the thing in the 70's and finished it up just a few years ago. Obviously, his writing improved over the years in non-DT stuff, so I'd be fascinated to see how it developed over the course of one long, continuos story.
On the OTHER hand, I'm afraid that if I start reading it, I'll end up in a bookstore one day babbling like a faggot to some poor sucker about this squirrel who runs a fucking galaxy... Jesus Moses, who wants that?
7)
January 10, 2008 5:03 PM Anonymous said... Please, tell us what happened between you and Flea. I used to love reading about your conversations together. 2 dynamic interesting personalities, always made reading about your conversations interesting and amusing.Nope. Some things are going to stay quiet. Sorry.
Besides, more than anyone else with a penis, ol' Fleabag has more than enough dirt on me. Best to keep these dogs in the ding dong toolshed. Haven't heard from him in months.
So anyway, while I have writing shit on the mind, let's continue the motif.
8)
January 5, 2008 12:29 PM First Off... said... re: Leaving Las Vegas. Wikipedia says: In the movie Ben dies in a hotel room. In the book he dies on Sera's couch.. You have the book - that ain't right, right?Why yes, total stranger, I do have the book. And at first I wondered what did you mean? That it wasn't right that I had the book or that the Wikipedia entry wasn't right? I'll opt for the latter... because how SILLY it would be for anyone to think it's not right that I have ANY book...
And after I wiped away the parrot shit, I looked up the last page and it says:
"
As his lifeless body grows cold on the hotel bed; unaware of her kiss, ripped from her soul and ordered to her lips as a final act, to bring to conclusion the hours she has spent at the window, watching his dead eyes watch the ceiling, and to give her a way to touch him beyond shutting those eyes; unaware of her eyes, at first wet, but then drying and remaining dry, even as the whimpers begin to rise from her throat, only to be lost in the din of the casino as she walks out of the hotel; unaware of her bed, the truth of her life, as it meanders back to her aparartment. She undresses, brushes her teeth, lies awake in the darkeness."
So he dies in a hotel. I have no idea why Wikipedia even exists. It was corrupted from the get-go. Almost completely worthless.
Although there WAS the time some fans tortured Scooter Keith by rewriting his Wikipedia entry over and over again, while Scooter feverishly righted the wrongs before reporting the torment to thew Wiki main base. Fun times.
That's the last paragraph of the book, by the way... and it's only two sentences long. I'm not kidding, look at it! Two sentences long. Mind boggling.
The book is
Leaving Las Vegas, the author is John O'Brien. O'Brien ended up dying in a car wreck, but really, he drank himself to death. And if you should ever find a picture of him, like say, on the back cover of one of his books, you will see him ROCK the mullet... BIG TIME.
9)
January 6, 2008 9:00 PM ...Widro said... The servers have crashed, dag nabit!10)
January 10, 2008 12:12 PM ... widro said... The FUCKING SERVERS. Hold on. Here we go...yep...we're down again...Oh Widro, you adorable little scamp. Being a wiseass, are ya'?
Well then, let me tell everyone about "The Taking of Triple H" and your role in it.
From the Midnight News (411 mania): 11/24/2003:THE BIGGEST BUT, PLUG OF THEM ALLI’m giving you a Thanksgiving gift. But don’t worry, even you godless Canadian heathens can enjoy it too.And when I do come back, I'll come back with the THUNDER.... those in the know can keep an eye on the secret place for a lot of new content and those NOT in the know can keep an eye out for a brand new And Another Thing piece right here at 411... when the new AAT is posted, you'll know I'm back.
Me: This column, 12.09.02 Almost a year later… finally.
I thought about setting this up… thought about cutting an excerpt or something… then decided not to. No teases… no hints… no previews.
This is what I want you to do. I want you to click on 411 sometime before 11:59 pm on Wednesday, and you’ll see it… staring you right in the face. “And Another Thing: The Taking of Triple H” and before you click, I want you to think about something…
I want you to think about what could possibly be in there. I want you to think what I could possibly have to say about Triple H that hasn’t been said before. I want you to think about every single thing I’ve ever written and wonder “Jesus, he’s pimped this so hard and for so long, he’s got a lot to live up to here. People will be PRAYING that he falls on his face and make a fool of himself.”
Then I want you remember what I’m about to say right here, right now…
It’s better than you could imagine.
For too long I’ve sat quietly and banged out half-assed crap columns because I didn’t have time to do otherwise and I’ve seen people say that I’m all done, I’m burned out, I’m washed up. I sat back and laughed.
For too long I’ve sat back and watched other writers try their very best to show off their talents, their knowledge, their skills. Some have done okay, others have sucked the big fat root… because I’ve been half-assing it, a lot of you might be thinking that I’m no longer the best damn writer you asses are lucky enough to get for free, that there are many, many more people out there waaaay better than me. Feel free to keep thinking that.
For WAAAAY too long I’ve had to sit and listen to you people bitch and moan about how I haven’t given you my best. Now you get to see why. Because I’ve learned to save my VERY best for special occasions… like this Wednesday. And by Christ, my best is staggering in its intensity!
To those who knew and trusted… the reward is here.
To those who are new to me… be prepared to be blown away.
And to the rest of you motherless cocksuckers… you’re all on notice. The finest piece of net work you’ve ever read is two days away. And all you’ll be able to do is sit there and pretend you didn’t read it. And be miserable.
In fact, I’m worried. I’m worried that a lot of you will only read what you see without fully understanding the layers I’m providing. Look for the subtext, assholes. Deep down it’s a philosophical essay on emotion vs practicality, business vs passion, money vs love. It’s also an examination on internet obsession on specifics and being wildly confident on base assumptions about what goes on inside the business (there’s even a self-effacing joke on…. well, you can find it and figure it out for yourself) . I’m worried that some of you idiots might skip the point and blow the thing off as just another Hyatte attempt to make fun of certain people.
And you ARE idiots if you blow it off so easily, because I did what I set out to do here. I held up my end.
There’s your goddam hint, by the way. Here’s another one: It’s huge… biggest column ever written. Period. The record is broken here. AND THERE ISN’T A GODDAM FAGGOTY “*” IN SIGHT!!!
It’s been a year in the making… a year of ups and downs for me personally and on the Net… a year where a lot of you have forgotten just how fucking good I can be. A year where you remembered how to underestimate me. Fuckfaces.
This Wednesday, you’re all gonna be reminded that I’m the King of the Net for a damn good reason.
This Wednesday, you’re all gonna be reminded that no one, NO ONE can touch me.
You bitches better run for cover.
Triple H gets taken this Wednesday.
You don’t deserve this or me.
This is Hyatte*****
Four years ago... wow.
Anyway, this is, like one my all-time FAVORITE ego-strokes ever. I am almost as proud of this as I was with the AAT itself. Look at me GO!!
Anyway, for those who may not know, "The Taking of Triple H" was a short story about three hardcore Canadian smarks who managed to kidnap Triple H before
Raw went on the air and held him hostage until McMahon put the title on the then-nice and sane Chris Benoit. Shenanigans ensued. The best anyone came up with as far as criticism went was that it was bad fan fiction... which it WASN'T... even though there was some gay raping on TWO occasions.
Trish Stratus had a featured part in it too. I'm pretty sure she wasn't terribly impressed.
There was nothing of its kind before or since, and it MADE THE POINTS I WANTED IT TO MAKE.... and it was funny, really funny. I'm generally very happy with it.
Thing is, I plugged it for a YEAR, and didn't get to seriously writing it until the last month, but once I knew it would be ready and it would be good, I coordinated with Widro to be ready on Wednesday evening to receive it and give it a PRIMO 411 spotlight. No one on that rinky dink site had anything like this... no one provided this sort of FREE handiwork
So, of course, Wednesday came and I was finished with it... just typed "The End", and went looking for Widro. He wasn't around.
Wednesday bled into Thursday, THANKSGIVING 2003!! And Widro wasn't around.
I COULD have gone and found Ashish, but Ashish was and probably still is a peckerhead. He wouldn't have done shit.
When Widro finally turned up... or maybe he answered an e-mail, he was despondent. Turns out a friend of his had the nerve to die right smack dab in the center of all this and Widro decided to question the meaning of life and how petty it all is.
"WHO CARES ABOUT YOUR FUCKING STORY!!! THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THEN FUCKING HYATTE!!!!" he bellowed. "TO HELL WITH YOUR STUPID STORY!! FUCKING RIDICULOUS BULLSHIT!! MY FRIEND IS GONE AND GOD REALLY SUCKS RIGHT NOW!!!"
Oy and Vey.
So Flea came to the rescue and put it up on his site, and did it in a way that Widro would've NEVER dreamed... he had the front page filled with the chpaters with a link to each chapter. It was really a choice piece of work.
So 411 missed out and Widro eventually got over this death and remembered that life is peaks and valleys and to this day claims that he didn't want that stupid story anyway.
Meanwhile, Flea said that the damn story grabbed something near 100'000 unique visits. But so long as Widro has Scooter Keith cranking out the "rants"... he was happy.
Fuckin' whiney asshole. Like I killed his friend or something. Like its MY fault. I only spent a fucking YEAR working on this thing for HIS SITE... douchebag.
It's a miracle I lasted three more years with the kid.
Where is "The Taking of Triple H" now? It vanished when Flea stopped paying for his site (sucks when I ain't there to bring in the FUN, ain't it? Oh, right... they all came to read Eric S.) I have it somewhere. It'll turn up eventually.
So that was my Thanksgiving 2003... which also featured a female friend of mine who announced "I'll leave you with the thought that right now my pussy is filled with cum." I didn't really care, but I didn't have the heart to tell her that. Until now.
And to be honest, "The Taking of Triple H" didn't exactly put the IWC on its ear... but for a few weeks it was the most interesting thing online.
A few more then I'll call it a blog...
11)
January 3, 2008 1:52 AM Patricia said... and half the reason he keeps up with this blog at all is because of certain people.Girl's right. And a big shout out to April Hunter!! Who's been reading me since the very first Mop-Up and NEVER ignores anything in my emails.
The other half is because its fun, in limited doses.
12)
November 17, 2007 7:47 PM ... T said... Hey Hyatte, Do you remember the first time?What kind of stupid question is that? Of COURSE I do. It was a trainwreck... and I kept slipping out... and finally I let her get on top and said, "I'll try to keep it going as long as I can"... then I came about ten seconds later.
Luckily, Mom was very understanding. Dad, not so much.
13)
December 11, 2007 10:31 PM ... Kitten said... i'm not able to call you anymore, at least drop me a line! its not fair we're not talking and i miss you. youre like my best buddy. let me know how you're doing christopher gary coleman hyatte.Well darling, every time we talk I make fun of the catcher's mitt your boyfriend has for a nose and then you ignore me for half an hour!! You are my best buddy and we'll talk real soon.
14)
January 2, 2008 12:12 PM... ryan79 said... Christ almighty, I subscribed to Lucard's Livejournal for a while. Hyatte is totally right about him being a self-centered douche that can apparently do no wrong. And it was EVERY DAY. Every fucking day he wrote a blog celebrating all things Lucard. Fucking ugh.He did pick his spots correctly, by only talking about me after I was long gone. Makes him a pussy, of course, but what can you do. He's a 30 year old man obsessed with Pikachu... breaking him would'a been easier than breaking Sean Shannon.
15)
January 3, 2008 11:39 AM ...Frank Castle said... Gloomy's hubby and Lucard are butt buddies. I think so anywayz.Wouldn't surprise me. By the way, I give Gloomie/Husband another 2 years max before she's running back to Dubuque and to a Divorce lawyer picked out by her mom. No offense.
16)
January 5, 2008 7:11 AM... LARS ULRICH said... TELL US. DID YOU GET NUDE PICTURES OF GLUMCHEN!?Lars?? WTF??
No, I missed the era of naked Gloomie online by a couple of years. I'm sure she is perfectly fetching in her birthday suit.
17)
January 5, 2008 2:53 PM ... Dolph Lundgren said... How big is your willy?Drago?? DRAGO??? HOLY COW!!
Pushing 6 inches, thank you very much.
Annnnd, well, I can't think of a better exit line, can you?
And if you leave here with one thought... rather then the length of my... err... "willy"... it's that I puked up BIG for you guys. 100% legit. If I had a camera I'd post a youtube clip of me watching that video and grabbing the basket.
And I'd be wearing a Konan bandido wrap while doing it... to hide the ID.
THAT IS LOVE, PEOPLE!!
I'll be back when I get back.
