Ham Slow walked by me the other day and stuck her fist out for a tap. I just stared at it and said, "uh uh, you let the OTHER white boys tap fists. I get more." And grabbed her fist and kissed it. She pulled away before I could get her first two fingers in my mouth. She was giggling, tho'
Today's installment will be STUFFED. I plan on answering a lot of questions. I also plan on shoving a LOT of secret messages in here, so you little bastards can eavesdrop and create your own theories. Just DON'T SHARE THEM WITH ME.
One day I'll open the floor and let you all take guesses, but not today.
Anyway, let's start things off by going completely homosexual on you all.
HIDDEN SECRET NOTES AND MESSAGES
All for one, viewed by many. Lead me on... you know you want to.
Ahem, I'm glad my love for Rihanna carried over to you, and yes, the song does speak to me about us, (which one of us is the black chick, tho'?)... but there are a couple of songs that have the same effect.
So here we have Rihanns's "Umbrella". Here are most of the lyrics and my comments on the side to SHOW just how prophetic they are!!
Umbrella by Rihanna
You have my heart (I told you I did)
And we'll never be worlds apart (AMEN, BABY!!!!)
May be in magazines (huh?)
But you'll still be my star (damn tootin')
Baby cause in the dark (Ooops, wrong hole, sorry baby))
You can't see shiny cars (nor my backfat, THANKYOU, THANKYOUVERYMUCH)
And that's when you need me there (True)
With you I'll always share (LIES!!)
Because
[Chorus]
When the sun shines, we’ll shine together (at least once every 6 weeks)
Told you I'll be here forever (No I didn't)
Said I'll always be a friend (True, but that would SUCK)
Took an oath I'ma stick it out till the end (Fuckin'... I will too... I'm a TOOL!!!)
Now that it's raining more than ever (DOWNPOURING, BABY!!)
Know that we'll still have each other (I know NOTHING of the sort!!)
You can stand under my umbrella (Where is it?)
You can stand under my umbrella (WHERE IS IT???)
(Ella ella eh eh eh) (Eh?)
Under my umbrella (Send me a Mapquest of its location)
(Ella ella eh eh eh) (EH??)
Under my umbrella (Directions on a napkin... ANYTHING)
(Ella ella eh eh eh) (who is this Ella?)
Under my umbrella (I'M GETTING SOAKED HERE!!)
(Ella ella eh eh eh eh eh eh) (bleh)
These fancy things, will never come in between (Unless it's a fancy vibrator, then I'm all over it!!)
You're part of my entity, here for Infinity (My favorite lyric of them all)
When the war has took it's part (there is a deeper meaning here)
When the world has dealt it's cards (There's always a re-deal, I keep telling you this)
If the hand is hard, together we'll mend your heart (Oh I'm hard, baby!)
Because
[Chorus]
When the sun shines, we’ll shine together (brighter than you think, kid)
Told you I'll be here forever (I made no such promises)
Said I'll always be a friend (pulling my pud)
Took an oath I'ma stick it out till the end (yeah, got me there)
Now that it's raining more than ever (MONSOON!! A CHINOOK!!!)
Know that we'll still have each other (.... yeah, I know)
You can stand under my umbrella (DONDE ESTA EL UMBRELLIO????)
You can stand under my umbrella (HOW ABOUT A GENERAL VICINITY???)
(Ella ella eh eh eh) (EH? What are you, Canadian?)
Under my umbrella (I'm gonna get hypothermia out here in this rain)
(Ella ella eh eh eh) (Eh, eh, eh... a Canadian stutterer??)
Under my umbrella (now my balls are soaked and wrinkly)
(Ella ella eh eh eh) (FEH)
And so on... and so forth
But like I said... there are a LOT of songs apply to us, baby. For instance, here is a big recent hit from a BEAUTIFUL singer and a GORGEOUS woman...
Big Girls Don't Cry by Fergie
Da Da Da Da (Which is exactly the sound I make when coming... "DA... DA... DA.... DUH... DA.... DAAAAAAAA YEAH BABY!!! WHOOOHOOOOO.... hookay then, money's on the nightstand, have a good one,")
The smell of your skin lingers on me now (some of that may be the farting I did while screaming "DA... DA... DA.... DUH... DA.... DAAAAAAAA YEAH BABY")
You're probably on your flight back to your home town (HA! What a great line. I'll have to use it one day)
I need some shelter of my own protection baby (I need ME TIME, baby)
To be with myself and center, clarity
Peace, Serenity (nothing wrong with chill time... private time to flirt with Mark McGrath on MySpace and that friend of yours from Wilmington as you try, once again, to find a better deal than me)
[CHORUS:]
I hope you know, I hope you know (I do baby. Uhh... know what?)
That this has nothing to do with you (what has nothing to do with me?)
It's personal, myself and I (That strange odor? YOU TOLD ME THAT WAS NORMAL FOR A GIRL YOUR AGE!!)
We've got some straightenin' out to do (Yeah, you're fucked up)
And I'm gonna miss you like a child misses their blanket (yeah well... wait a minute..)
But I've got to get a move on with my life (waiiiit a second... hold on... WAIT A SECOND HERE)
It's time to be a big girl now (NO!! Growing up is overrated!! OVERRATED!!)
And big girls don't cry (Of course they do, once their triceps start shaking uncontrollably whenever they move))
The path that I'm walking (I don't believe this)
I must go alone (Bad choice by Hyatte)
I must take the baby steps 'til I'm full grown, full grown (This has nothing to do with anything concerning us)
Fairytales don't always have a happy ending, do they? (YES THEY DO GODDAMMIT!!)
And I foresee the dark ahead if I stay (BRING THAT DAMN UMBRELLA OVER TO ME AND STOP THIS STUPID-TALK)
ENOUGH... ignore this song. Has NOTHING to do with our true love, baby.
Here. try THIS song by Fergie Ferg...
All That I Got (The Make Up Song) by Fergie (cameo by Will I. Am)
Baby, baby when you’re looking deep in my eyes
I know you’re seeing past my make-up
Into the little girl that used to hide out and cry
When her parents fought
Tryin’ to be strong
You can see the hurt in me
The cover ups so secretly
And all that I aspire to be
You see, you see
You know who I really am
No entourage or caravan
And do u even give me a damn
About all that, tell me
[Chorus]
Would you love me if I didn't work out or I didn't change my natural hair
I could be the one you want to grow older with, baby
I’ll give you all that I got
See, I don't mean to scare you now and push you away
Cause I’m not tryin’ to rush anything
But when i look into your eyes I'm not scared you'll say,
I see little you, I’m in the picture too
Like a happy family tree
We’re together constantly
This could be eventually
We’ll see, we’ll see
But all that I have got to know
Is with me baby will you grow
Through sun and rain and heavy snow
Oh tell me so now baby
[Chorus x2]
[Will.I.Am:]
It’s as simple as one and two
I’m in love with you
And three and four
You’re all I adore
To the seven and eight
See I’ve been making mistakes
Cause when you’re on my mind
I just cant think straight
Back to the five and six
I’m all in the mix and I'm all into you
Without the lipstick
Without the L’Oreal
You remain the same angel that I fell for
For real, for real
Okay then, now we're talking.
And last but not least... you want a song that SCREAMS you and me... well, look no further than the QUEEN of silly love songs...
Can't Let Go by Mariah Carey
There you are holding her hand
I am lost
Dying to understand
Didn't I cherish you right
Don't you know you were my life
Even though I try
I can't let go
Something in your eyes
Captured my soul
And every night I see you in
My dreams
You're all I know
I can't let go
Just cast aside
You don't even know I'm alive
You just walk on by
Don't care to see me cry
And here I am
Still holding on
I can't accept
My world is gone
No no
Even though I try
I can't let go
Something in your eyes
Captured my soul
And every night I see you in
My dreams
You're all I know
I can't let go
Oh
Do you even realize the sorrow
I have inside
Everyday of my life
Do you know the way it feels
When all you have just dies
I try and try to deny that I need you
But still you remain on my mind
Even though I try
I can't let go
Something in your eyes
Captured my soul
And every night I see you in
My dreams
You're all I know
I can't let go
No I just can't get you out of my mind
I never can say goodbye
'Cause every night
I see you in my dreams
Even though I try
I can't let go
Something in your eyes
Captured my soul
And every night I see you in
My dreams
You're all I know
I can't let go
Here's hoping you never do.
Any one of these songs - and a lot more - remind me of you. And gets me thinking. I think so much about you it's part of me now. Thinking of you is now part of my personality.
And I DON'T CARE if the mood has passed. I felt like reminding you of this.
(note to everyone else reading... this line is GOLD... use it when appropriate and I hope you have better luck then me. All I got was a yawn)
No no, no, NOOOO, don't phunk with my HEART
I wonder if I took you home, would you still be IN LOVE, BABY... IN LOVE BABY??
Let's try to keep this going longer than 3 weeks this time, okay baby? Please?
And to everyone bored to tears here... heh, my blog, my rules.
*******
One thing I am LOVING is AIM radio. They show some XM stations on it for free. It's sweet to log on, go invisible, and just mellow out. Right now I'm listening to the Janet Jackson all the time station. If my favorite song comes Up I will stop and jam with you all online. Yes I will.
*******
What some of you, especially the youngsters, may not realize is that if this Writer's Strike goes on too much long, we will be SERIOUSLY hurting for entertainment.
No new scripted shows covers EVERYTHING... HBO, FX, Showtime, Internets. What? You think you can get by on YOUTUBE???
It's not HORRIFYING tho'. It was horrifying in 1988, during the last writer's strike that lasted 6 months. Then we only had ABC, NBC, and CBS. FOX was just two hours on Saturday and Sunday (anyone remember "The New Adventures of Beans Baxter"? How about "Open House"?) We, as American consumers, were CRIPPLED by this strike. REPEATS!! REPEATS REPEATS REPEATS!!. My poor mother considered moving to Texas to personally find Larry Hagman and find out what that weasel Cliff Barnes was up to.
At least now we have billions of cable stations to poass the time with. If you ain't a fan of Mythbusters, or Dirty Work, or Ghosthunters, or Inside the Obesity Clinic... I suggest you GET used to it, fast.
Reality TV, sports, and repeats! Oh, and wrestling. Great. That's our entertainment options for the next YEAR if this strike goes on for too much longer
The WWE writers, who left their Hollywood jobs (Brian Gerwitz wrote Jenny, which was Jenny McCarthy's first sitcom that lasted 4 weeks - and there are a lot of soap opera writers in there too) had to LEAVE the WGA in order to get the WWE creative gig. You think they regret this or maybe wish they COULD join the strike and take a vacation?
They're probably reading about the strike and thinking, "On one hand, it's nice to keep a steady paycheck. On the other hand... Jesus, I miss the times when I felt like a REAL writer!!"
I haven't seen a real writer amongst this group. Although I'm sure what we see on WWE TV is a LOT of Vince McMahon re-writing.
************
Okay so, it's time for everyone's favorite part of this blog:
-November 10, 2007 12:25 PM Patricia said... From disgruntled in Toronto: Check out Brit band McFly's cover of 'Umbrella'. x
Sucked. Horrible. Which member of the band are you dating?
I'm just trying to figure out what your name links to.
November 11, 2007 2:43 AM... T.A.C. said... sometimes, i feel like an eavesdropper....disgruntled in toronto undisgruntled someone she doesn't even know. just cuz she reminded me that hyatte likes RHIANNA (seriously though, for REAL??), and that makes me laugh out loudz. and also cuz sometimes it's fun to think i've figured things out, even if i'm later proven wrong.
And to everyone else... this is the plan, well, one of them, of this blog. To keep you wondering. And the fact that I keep the comments open to ANYONE... anonymous, create-a-name, anything you want only adds to the fun.
It's fun for me too.
And is it who you all think it MAY BE... could be. Or maybe a faker. Or maybe me just fucking with you all. Is it the same person I shoot secret messages to? Or is that someone else.
Just shut up and work the clues, people. I'm still issueing the "Not for comments" rule, but obviously, as I let this guy's comment through, it's on a case by case basis. You're all on a short leash here. Sky's the limit on anything else.
- September 18, 2007 4:26 PM... Anonymous said: Have you seen the new Doctor Who?
No but I once fucked a Dental Assistant who looked like an owl.
And yes, you waited almost two months for this response
-September 22, 2007 11:49 PM... tom said... which site did you enjoy writing the most for?
Scoops, definitely. It put me on the map, it made me a legend, and if I stayed and managed to convince Al that selling out would be the DUMBEST idea, the Internet would be a lot different around today and I'd probably be making some money by now.
Declaration of Independents comes second because, while I lost a good chunk of my usual readers, I GAINED a shitload of new ones... Missy Hyatt finally figured out who I was, and hated me, Jasmin St. Clair screamed at Sean for an hour about me, Tammy Sytch may have finally learned how she is connected to my column, Mark Madden tried to sue me there, and I got to show Frank Goodman what a fucking Internet beatdown REALLY was. That was a fun year and a half. But I was definitely feeling the burn-out with all this wrestling talk.
411 comes third because at the time it was a pretty big site that LOTS of people went to (maybe they still do, I don't know) and I built my "And Another Thing" columns there. The Mop-Ups were toast by then, but it was where I created a THIRD style of column that has since been used as the way columns are written. (Midnight News)
ScoopThis comes fourth because... well, I wrote my first column there, then went away for 5 weeks, then did a SECOND Mop-Up, then took a week off, then did... like a 20 week run of columns that I STILL never topped. I did it because I felt guilty to them for pulling the prima donna act and doing only 2 columns in 2 months and they weren't doing anything else on the site and it was just me for 20 weeks. Plus it was fun watching Scoops squirm after I abandoned them.
Inside Pulse comes last because the site was and is a disaster and Widro never should have left Ashish. I lost more readers at IP then anywhere else.
So there you go. Scoops was where I changed the rules, ScoopThis has some of my funniest recaps, 411 was where I started having fun, IP was where I wanted to shoot myself in the face, and DOI is where I found new things to fuck with.
-September 21, 2007 6:55 PM ... Anonymous said... do you still have a subscription to the Wrestling Observer Newsletter?
Yup. I'm one of the sheep. Worth every penny, too. I have a Torch sub too but that's more for the audio stuff and message board stuff and building a case against the overall gayness that is Wade Keller (nice guy, but make him swallow a coal and he'll shit out a diamond, and a few hamsters, and various car keys.
Anyway, let's stick with the IWC theme for a minute...
-October 11, 2007 4:33 PM... Charles A... said... Speaking of how bad Scoops edited your stuff any chance you have those old Mop-Ups? I think it would be a fun look back at how wrestling was 10 years ago; before people started dying and all. For anyone wondering RichinKC still works with DDP on his website.
I have them, on disks, somewhere around here.
The problem is that I'm very lazy. And I'm not sure if they hold up.
I'll see what I can do. They might be gone, or sitting in Florida being stared at by a drunk who has almost cleaned all the shit out of his oatmeal.
(that one is so inside not even the usual inside target is getting this one)
-October 22, 2007 9:27 AM... Anonymous said... Why dont you buy a bootleg set of wrestling challange/superstars/SNMEs and Mop them UP? So all your old stuff is gone? Thats amazing, when I was reading red stripe, I did wonder if I should be saving it.
I have a better idea, why don't I buy a major league baseball, coat it in superglue, roll it in broken glass, dip it in hydrocloric acid, and go down to the bus station and have some crackhead shove it right up my ass for $50.
Scooter does all that stuff, I don't anymore.
-November 8, 2007 10:36 AM ... Anonymous said... Hey, I noticed you got a link on InsidePulse. Apparently they're bringing back some mystery writer and they "secretly" linked a bunch of the well-known IWC guys in the teaser. The funny thing is, here's the company they put you in: Sean Shannon, Al Isaacs, Ben Morse, Flea, Eric S., Scots, Keith, Grut and CRZ. Ben fucking Morse? Are you kidding me?
And to SHOW that I am a fucking genius... here's the answer I gave in the comments scetion:
November 9, 2007 1:36 PM Chris said... It's probably Eric
And of course, it was Eric S.
Well who else COULD it be? I mean, DUH.
They did a fine job with the "Viral marketing" scam, the problem is NO ONE CARES. "THE IWC IS ON NOTICE" Well, who is that? There IS no more IWC. I'm sorry. It's dead. No one pays attention to anyone else anymore. I can't go cracking on anyone and expect a good ol' fashioned feud... and even if I did, I'd feel like an asshole doing it.
Wrestling on the web is Meltzer, Scherer, the Torch, and message boards. That's it. One of them just strokes our cocks a little to get us buying his newsletter, Scherer threatens us with computer destruction via ads and spyware unless we pay for his site, and Keller... well, actually, Wade keller runs a good free site and a good pay site. Got to hand it to him, you get a lot of bang for your buck with him.
And then Eric came back and he doesn't change. He still can't find a permenant job, he still drives the same van, he's still cranky and on more meds than the entire WWE locker room.
Seriously, it HAD to be Eric.
-Sean Shannon doesn't have the balls (heh, he's still pre-op HA!!) to come back, or the desire.
-Scooter is STILL there so what's the point of a big build up?
-Al Isaacs has been burned by the Internet (worse then I was burned last Summer) and won't be trying to return, and even if he did he'd buoild his own site and NOT be just another writer on a site no one goes to
-Grut is there part time and probably doesn't have the motivation to do it full time
-CRZ is a weirdo.
-Scotsman would do one column, maybe two, then get sick of it and that would be the end.
-Ben Morse was never a wrestling writer
-Flea has NO staying power. He gets bored very easy, and he hates that writing a column is harder than it seems. And its no fun without me around.
-And Hyatte... me? I have no intention of ever coming back. And if I did, it would be at the DOI site.
And who else COULD it be? No one.
This was a decent (if not a shameless rip-off) build-up... but the pay-off has no choice but to be a letdown. The IWC was put on notice but the irony is, what's left of the IWC didn't notice. Except for me, and that's because someone mentioned it in the comments section. And I'm HARDLY the IWC anymore.
Move ON, Widro... build something different.
November 6, 2007 12:29 PM Anonymous said... How big of a douchebag is that Larry Csonka on 411? Not only is he a pizza cook, but a wrestler and now a a writer of movies. Seriously, have you ever read a bigger douche?
And since I didn't answer fast enough, he needed to make SURE I'd comment.
November 11, 2007 2:43 AM Anonymous said... Seriously. How big of a douche is Larry Csonka. He really is all that is wrong with The IWC. That and he now claims to write Tremors 4 and find the time to be a wrestler while having to work as a pizza cook to pay bills. Fucking douche.
Do you realize that in both posts you openly wondered hor big a douche(bag) he is AND you ended... WAIT A SECOND... MY FAVORITE JANET JACKSON SONG JUST CAME ON...
Everybody on the floor (Let's go)
Let's get HARDCORE!!! (Get low)
Make my SWEAT POUR!!! (Oh no)
Don't stop (Gimme some more)
Ooh my body's yours (SPANK THAT!!)
Spank that back door (HANDPRINTS ON YO BLACK SKIN!!!!)
Drive me like a Porsche' (or a very nice Camry)
I could dance all night (ME TOO!! with several breaks in between)
Can we take this party higher? (SOMEONE GRAB THE OXY!!!)
Now just put your hands to the sky and
Clap, clap, clap, clap
I could dance all night
I have to buy this CD in case I can score Ham Slow. Miss Jackson (cuz I'm nasty) will help me lead her to the promise land.
Anyway... you ended both posts with "douche". I find this amusing.
The answer is no. I don't go to 411mania anymore. I swear. The only reason I USED to go is to find shit for my column. I'm not into findind internet wrestling shit for my blog. And I don't find 411mania worth my time.
When I was at DOI, as many of you might remember, I mentioned that Larry Csonka is bragging about being a wrestler and BEGGED anyone reading to PLEASE verify this. Mind you, DOI is the goddam ONLINE INDY GROUND ZERO!! If you are in the business, and not a full time WWE'er, you visit DOI, if only to see what your friends are doing.
No one ever said a peep.
I don't know Csonka from a Jersey housewife... but if he makes pizza, then he delivers for Dominos. If he writes movies, then why isn't he out striking? Everyone writes books and movies, and they sit in a drawer or harddrive and is never seen by anyone. Writing shit is easy, writing sellable shit is hard.
Csonka is like anyone else online. Puffing up the online image because the self-image needs stroking.
-October 18, 2007 10:09 AM ... Raxa said... Hi-8. Who's this Steve Cook clown over at 411? He sure as hell can't write, and his Ask411 feature is just horrible.Answers like: Q: Who was the last ECW champion? A: It may have been Rhino. Or the janitor. I may be right, I may not be. Who can say? That's just my opinion. He also seems to have women issues. And not in a good way.
I have no clue who this Steve Cook is. Listen, 411 and Inside Pulse and the Lords of Pain (are they even still around?) are CUT AND PASTE SITES!!! Why go THERE?? For the unique perspectives? Okay... who are they?
I'm telling you. People scream "You ego-jacked fucktard!!" at me for this... but I SAW which way the wind was blowing. We ran fresh OUT of interesting viewpoints and colorful takes... we ran out of original voices.
You think I was joking when I said I was the last of a dead breed? Most of the writers we have now over on my two sites are just dopey kids who don't want to put forth too muych effort in their columns and have nothing to say either.
So go visit 411 and IP and have a good time! But for me, it's just a waste of my time. I'm the best damn writer they ever had and I KNOW I'm just another asshole... what chance does Larry Csonka have at being anything other than a jackoff with a keyboard?
-November 2, 2007 3:41 PM ... Anonymous said... you should go back to the doi for 39 cents per week and recap tna
Sean, those checks would bounce too, you broke-ass motherfucker.
And that porn site you gave me the free password to has dried up. Get me another one, quick. Trish wants to watch and take notes.
October 26, 2007 10:27 AM... Anonymous said... What happened to 1ryderfakin?
Flea gets boared with things and couldn't think of anything to do with the site. I'll give the guy credit, he had The Taking of Triple H perfectly formatted too. Better then Widro would've done.
Next time I'll tell the story of The Taking of Triple H. Oh yes, there is backstory there.
Okay... five more and then I'm calling it a blog
-November 2, 2007 5:58 PM... Anonymous said... Something ironic about Elijah Burke hunting spooks. HEY-YO!
Not sure if I noticed, eh?
Puts envelope to head
"A Large Florida Reptile, a place to keep beer, and a place where they show movies"
A LARGE FLORIDA REPTILE... A PLACE TO KEEP BEER... AND A PLACE WHERE THEY SHOW MOVIES...
rip... poof
"Name an AlliGATOR, a refridgERATOR, and a movie thEATRE"
HAHAHAHAHA HOOOOO HIYOOOOOOOOOO
My your wife demand that you tear down your ding dong TOOLSHED.
-November 13, 2007 8:02 PM Patricia said... Yeah, get a Myspace page.
Oh God, and be one of hundreds of friends?? And supply a picture?? And go through the nightmare of building a friend list and sending messages and... ugh ugh UGH.
There are more fun ways to get daily contact going, my dear.
-October 16, 2007 4:34 PM ... Tim said... Question: Do you buy books or visit the local library.
BOOKSTORE!! Libraries are for suckers.
That's wrong of me. Libraries are a VITAL part of getting kids to start reading.
But I never return the books on time.
Years ago, I borrowed "His Way: The Unauthorized Frank Sinatra Story" by Kitty Kelly from my local library... and it was a fine read.
A year later I remembered that this book wasn't mine and someone else should read it. So I took it back. A full year later. MORE than a year, in fact.
So since I borrowed it, they had overhauled their library and now the entrance was in the back of the building... and instead of stepping right into the library and the WORLD OF BOOKS AND KNOWLEDGE AT MY FINGERTIPS... there was a large foyer... empty, with a door leading to the books.
And a receptionist at the desk.
So I slipped the book towards the drop-off... but she stuck out her hand and said, "I'll take that." She was an older woman... a grandmother, really, with the sweetest smile only a grandmother could have.
I handed her the book and turned to leave. I peeked over my shoulder as she opened my book... filled with stains and marks, and nicks from a year + in my posession...
And the grandmotherly smile dropped. Her plump, red lips PURSED into a scowl.
I walked faster.
She looked up at me, then looked closer at the book return date, as if to double-check.
I ran out of there. Ran like HELL ITSELF was on my tail!!
And I haven't ben there since.
I'm a bookstore guy now. If I want a book, I'll steal it... or buy it, depends.
-November 7, 2007 10:01 AM ... T.A.C. said... jeezus hyrate (tm Flea?) -- it's taken you THIS long to realize that words work on chicks??? some take poetry, some take songs, some take bullshit, some take logically presented business plans.... but every chick has a weak spot for words. it's that whole "communication" thing, i figure.... but despite this, congrats. you're still better than me. :D
You again?
See, the point isn't that I wrote her something fruity that she fell for. I WROTE HER A BUSINESS PLAN IN TWO HOURS (collectively) THAT SHE COULDN'T WRITE IN WEEKS AND GOT HER AN A ON IT EVEN THOUGH I HAVE ZERO FORMAL BUSINESS EDUCATION!!!
Trust me, there probably ain't ANYONE EVER IN THE HISTORY OF THE IWC who knows how to get girls to fall for you with just words. I had a LOT of them fall for me. I'd start naming them but that's considered too tacky.
Many of them are reading this and are STILL getting turned on.
-October 11, 2007 7:50 PM ... Brian said... I was wondering if there was any chance you will post some of your non-wrestling related writing here. It would be great to read any type of writing you have done whether its short stories, poetry, a novel, etc. If you aren’t going to I understand but it would be nice to read some of you’re work and have it not be about wrestling. One quickie question too, what do you think of us, your fans? I mean do you look down on us or think of us as just stupid geeks or equals of sorts?
I) Sure, I'll put up a short story here. Working on a couple right now, in fact.
2) What do I think of you guys? Honestly? I have no business looking DOWN on you'all, especially since the ones who never cared for me... and in fact HATE ME, have the good sense to not start in on me here. This isn't a threat, what I'm saying is that there's no point to tell me I suck ON MY OWN BLOG... there's nothing to prove... and its not like you'll ruin my day.
What do I think of you guys? You found me all the time, you stuck around all this time. I gave you free labor and you gave me an audience. I wouldn't have done ten years of columns if I thought I was preaching to the small crowd I have right now, here... but doing this, having fun, fucking with secret notes and giving you all some answers you might have always wondered...
I'm sure some of you are stupid geeks... but we all grew up together, kind of. I am talking to husbands, wives, businessmen, salesmen, artists, students, and janitors. I know one or two of you are filthy rich, I'm sure many of you are middle class, and maybe a couple of you are dirt poor. It's all the same to me. You leave comments that are fun, respectful, smart, and sometimes even witty.
And two of you I want to fuck really, really badly... maybe three if April Hunter is still reading.
So there you go.
WOW... quite a blog. Fill my comments section because, as you know, I show up only once or twice a week... so throw in comments and everyone will have an excuse to check this out every day.
Talk to you later, brothers and sisters
